Monday, June 20, 2011

Well, I bottled "The Monster". It was a chore, but it's in bottles.

A few weeks back I brewed up my first home brew beer creation, what I've been calling "The Monster", because I really didn't have a good idea what it was going to taste like. After a long weekend of Father's Day festivities, I came home from work with the plan of running and then bottling the beer. Unfortunately Morgan took an unexpected slip and injured her knee. With some luck she'll be just fine, but it put the kobash on running today.

Okay, so it's time to bottle then. I was already behind the curve because I had forgotten to sanitize my bottles overnight, so that took a hour in the dishwasher. Time to prep the bottling bucket, bottling wander, etc. Except I had no sanitizer. Frak. As much as I hated to do it, I used bleach. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.

Forty-Eight Glorious Bottles of "The Monster"
Politics and home brew ethics aside, it truly was a horrible experience. I got high on the fumes in the bathroom and then burned myself a dozen times trying to rise the bleach off with boiling hot water. Not to mention the twenty plus minutes lost to the sanitizing process. At least we got a jump on cleaning the apartment.

Okay, everything cleaned and sanitized. Time to bottle. Twelve bottles, twenty-four, thirty-six, forty-eight, fifty. Time to cap. Twelve, twenty-four, thirty-six, forty-eight, fifty. Sweet! Wait, crap, I forgot to take a final reading with the hydrometer. Again. I haven't remembered to measure a single one of my beers. Oh well, no big deal. What's a few ABV among friends?

Time to clean up. Wash this, clean that, put the other way. Counters, floors, bath tub, buckets, fermenter, lids, tools. Wait, why is my big stirring spoon in the clean pile, I didn't wash it yet. Wait, it's clean. Wait, I didn't stir with it. Wait. PRIMING SUGAR!!!!!

On the right, a glass of beer. On the left, the priming sugar that should be in said beer.
Yep, the priming sugar is right where I left it. On the stove, in the 4 quart saucier, nicely cooled and ready to pitch into the bottling bucket. The empty bottling bucket. With the two plus cases of beer on the floor. FRAK ME. I yelled so loud the wife came running thinking I hurt myself.

Time to order some Cooper's Carbonation Drops. Again, not optimal, but I want to save this beer if I can. Open the laptop. Open RockMelt. Type in "www.midwestsupplies.com". Click "Brewing Ingredients". Click "Corn Sugar/Carbonation Drops". Click "Cooper's Carbonation Drops". OUT OF STOCK. At least Amazon has them in stock, and with Prime Shipping too! One of only two wins today.

The other win? Well, I wish the beer had a more pronounced flavor, but based upon taste - and feel - I think we're up around 7% ABV. It's malty with a nice hoppy backbone and definitely is an improvement from my first two beers, especially since it's a derivative beer from the American Strong Ale. And what about the name, well, this one is now officially "The Closet Monster".

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